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On my last page, I told him that it’s his story now and that there are still many white pages that can be filled.’ It might be obvious to many people but doing all this to a guy who is not interested (and possibly not used to dealing with girls) is not only ineffective but also counterproductive. If he was experienced in dating, he could have said something like, ‘I know that you are interested in me but I just don’t see you that way.I appreciate that you are making an effort but I don’t think it’s going to work. ’ But there’s only so much you can expect from a Japanese computer science major boy. ‘Over three weeks later that he completely ignored the whole thing’, she writes. ‘All of my friends told me that this is just such a wonderful present that he has to fall in love with me’, she writes.He might be right, but the word ‘childish’ makes me think that his culture might have a different concept of maturity.Being ‘mature’ in Japan can be seen as ‘childish’ elsewhere and vice versa.Every page had about 2 or 3 sentences in English and Japanese and a drawing.I’m horribly bad at drawing but I put lots of effort and I got honest praise from the people around me whom I showed the book.Many people provided counter-examples in the comments.My personal experience also tells me that dating in Japan is completely feasible and a lot of my friends seem to be doing OK with dating here.
The book ended with telling him that I was still willing to date him even though he turned me down with this obvious excuse of working in the same team. I want her to stop doing embarrassing things in front of people but I don’t know how. Hopefully it will stop as time goes by.’ She was giving emotional gifts he couldn’t reciprocate, and that put him under a lot of pressure and made him uneasy.
He might be judging Japanese women based on his cultural values without taking into account the Japanese context.
Since he didn’t specify what made him think that girls of his age were childish I can only speculate, but if he doesn’t make effort to unlearn his cultural values and learn new sets of values, he is likely to continue having difficulty.
I’m currently the only Western female student here, so I get quite some attention, even from other foreign students.
But Japanese guys are still a big mystery to me’, she writes.
A guy says that it’s very hard for him to have good relationships with Japanese women.